“Welcome to the best club you never wanted to be apart of”

Well

It’s been a while

Funnily enough (well not funny) the last blog post I wrote was about my wedding and I’ve not been able to swallow another one. So it comes with a big pill to swallow that the next one is all about being a single mum.

I’ve been advised to avoid posting on social media and from all the nasty trolls I got the last time I’m not. But what I will say is that we arent together, haven’t been for the last 5 months. In actual honesty I don’t think we’ve really been ‘together’ for a lot longer and we’ve both moved on.

We stay civil for the sake of the children. We have a routine that’s all locked down. It’s not easy but we will get there.

I’ve FOR SURE learnt a lot from this. It’s the most expensive lesson I’ve learnt but one I will treasure.

So this is what I know;

1) I’m an amazing mum!

I’m a far better mother doing it on my own. I have my own way of raising them and we got our little team locked down. Delilah has been a god send helping me out, Indiana is well Indi. I’m blessed with good kids. Don’t get me wrong they have their moments and some times when I’m running on zero sleep and they won’t get their god damn shoes on for school so we can wait in the pouring rain for the bus- it’s hard! I wouldn’t change it for the world.

2) I get to parent the way I want!

It does get hard when I’m trying to juggle everything. Life is crazy and being a working mum comes with its challenges. Trying to balance all the juggling plate you know?

But at the end of the day my head isn’t filled with toxic vibes and no manipulating. There isn’t anyone telling me how or why I should do things. It’s my way now.

3) I have learnt to deal with difficult things

Getting my finances in check was hard but I wouldn’t of done it without my mum. She organised EVERYTHING and I can recommend some great resources if anyone needs help.

4) I know exactly what I do and don’t want for our future

At first it was hard living alone with the children but I fully put my stamp on the house and made it a chick palace. We are staying put for the time being and he moved out. I’m saving to get my own home and I fancy a little move just unsure where yet.

5) I know who my real friends are.

The ones that check in, that help raise them with me. They raise me up. That’s one of the beautiful things about being a young mum. I did it with them! The wonderful thing about being a young mum is that my friends have a wonderful influence on them.

6) I REALLY appreciate my family.

They’ve been the biggest source of help and support. I truly love them for it. They got my house in order, the helped me chuck shit loads of black bin bags into the tip with me clearing his stuff out. It felt liberating to be honest.

7) I know what I want in a man. Like truly.

I won’t settle for anything less than what I deserve. I know my worth now! I have higher standards and I know what I want and need in a guy.

Maybe there’s someone but that’s my business and will stay that way.

8) We are better off as friends than we ever was together.

We actually get on well as friends really well. There’s no bad blood there anymore and we have a laugh. I don’t have a bad word to say about him as a dad either I’m lucky to have him as the father to my kids. I was asked if I’d always have a bond with him being my “baby daddy” and the answer is 1000000% no. Just mates.

9) I’m truly happier and I know what happiness is.

For the time being I’m just trying to get through it but I’m in a really good place right now. Don’t get me wrong I’ve had some lows and I had to dig my way out of that dark place but I’ve seen the light and I know I’m better off hear with my babies.

Peace and love

Sophie.

Xoxo

Great single mum accounts to follow on the gram;

• @remi.sade
• @solo.mamma
• @mre.soeur
• @alright.bab
• @alrightforamum_
• @gingerbreadcharity
• @freeda_en